Monthly Archives: August 2008

I Remember Now

Tomorrow I’m going to be heading out for my annual “guys weekend” that I do with 12 other guys that rode dinosaurs to class. We’ve been doing this now for about six years, taking what really amounts to four days including travel to go somewhere in the Southeast US and act like students again for three nights or so. It is, of course, a blast. So off I go tomorow morning first thing to fly into Atlanta and drive from there.

As I thought about the trip coming up the other day I had this strange feeling that something was different about my frame of mind that I couldn’t quite grasp. Then it hit me – when I go to the airport tomorrow it will be the first time I’ve done so in 10 days. That is probably the longest stretch I’ve gone since the beginning of the year without flying. Instead I’ve been here in Dallas each day, back in a regular routine of being in the office, going to sleep and waking up at regular times, cooking and eating healthy food, etc.

It’s been awesome. I remember now what it’s like to have a less stressful routine where you can sort of plan out your week and relax a bit at times other than the weekend. It’s a common pleasure for most people but something that has eluded me most of the past few years.

To this point in 2008, I have taken about 60 flights to and from various points in the world. That averages out to two flights a week or so, but even that number is deceptive on two counts. One, there have been times when that number has been as high as six flights in a week and two, it doesn’t give you a feel for how many nights I’ve been away from my Dallas home. I haven’t added that up but I’m guessing that it’s on the order of 150 nights or more. So figure that out of roughly 230 days in the year so far I’ve been gone well more than half of them.

That stinks.

I haven’t figured out what this means for me yet, but I’m beginning to feel like I just have to find a way to spend less time on the road as I look forward to future years. Greater than 50% travel is just not an acceptable lifestyle.

Domestic Disturbances

A consequence of living in an urban apartment building is that occasionally you hear what is going on with your neighbors.

Take, for example, the Guitar Heroes that are across the hall from me. They will fire up their (real) guitars two or three times per week and play and sing covers of various popular songs. I almost never hear them anywhere except in the hallway – only once can I recall the sounds of bass guitar within my apartment.

Then there is High Heels above me. Never having met her, I don’t know any details of her work or personal habits. I do know that on occasion they involve brisk snippy sounding walks on a hard surface immediately above my bedroom between the hours of 10 pm and 2 am. Fortunately this doesn’t happen much.

There are also the sounds of nice weather. Living here in Uptown I’ve noticed a very strong correlation between that and loud drunks late at night. Last fall, winter and spring whenever the evenings were pleasant you would have thought you were living in Times Square. Lots of late night loud carousing which reaches it’s peak of random disturbances at about 3 am.

Usually the sounds my neighbors make are something like these examples. Anonymous, mostly harmless, desultory. But not always.

Last night I got a pizza across the street – too tired to cook after the bike ride. As I was walking back through the building to my apartment I heard something that I wished I hadn’t. Inside one of the apartments I was passing I heard a woman shouting at the very top of a voice that was shaking with rage and sadness. Since I didn’t stop I heard only a few words:

“You don’t even want me! You don’t even care about me!”

It is hard to describe without actually hearing it, but setting the specific words aside the sounds that she was making were those of a broken spirit. The male response was just loud enough to know that he wasn’t on the other end of a phone line. He was in there somewhere receiving that gale of emotion, but not participating in it.

It is hard to imagine that whatever relationship existed on the other side of that door survived yesterday evening. If it did I would wonder if it should have.

It’s not the first time I’ve heard that kind of intensity walking down the hallways, but it is maybe only the second or third time. I wonder if hearing that sort of thing is partly a consequence of the fact that the average age in this building is so young – I would suspect it’s somewhere between 25 and 30. But on second thought it also makes me wonder how often that sort of emotional volcanism exists in the private lives of the average person everywhere. For me it has been incredibly rare. I think I heard shouting in the house I grew up in only one time. I used to joke with people that if you heard someone in my family raising their voice you could expect to see weapons drawn shortly thereafter. It just didn’t happen. Major conflicts were not contests of decibels, but rather struggles of stony silence.

People watching. If you do it right, do you learn more about others or yourself?

Blood and Iron Once More

It is a great disservice to the average American’s understanding of the world that so few of us know much about the history of Europe leading up to the First World War. At no time in recent years has this fact felt more important to me than it does now. Russia’s invasion of Georgia has given me the awful feeling that we are witnessing an ominous repetition of history.

Here in America we view the threat of mass conflict largely through the lens of the Second World War, with its archetype aggressor, Adolf Hitler standing as a pure symbol of evil unleashed. Hitler now personifies aggression and the inevitability of war for generations of Americans. For that reason I think we don’t see today’s less obvious risks to the peace when we ought to. The next great war might very well arrive unheralded by a new monster of Hitler’s stature. They often do.

Right before the outbreak of the First World War, Europe and America were in the midst of what is now referred to as The Gilded Age. Victorian Europe was a place of unprecedented wealth and peace. While had experienced smaller wars during the 1800′s, by the turn of the 19th century the continent had not known major warfare since Napoleon’s defeat nearly 100 years earlier. So it was that in the early 1900′s many Europeans believed that the building tensions between Germany, France, England, Austria, Russia and “lesser powers” were unlikely to explode into a large-scale war. They believed this in part because it had been so long since a major conflict involving all of the continent’s countries had occurred. They believed that they were in a “new era” where skillful diplomacy made such things impossible. They also thought that such a large scale conflict would totally devastate the fantastic wealth that Europe had come to enjoy because of the long peace – in other words, a large and devastating war just wasn’t rational.

They were wrong on the first count, and right on the second one. Large scale conflict was entirely possible as the outbreak of war so clearly demonstrated in 1914, and the magnitude of that conflict did indeed impoverish Europe very thoroughly. So much so, in fact, that Europe was radically transformed. In just a few years it went from the now romanticized and ornate vestiges of old monarchies and nobilities to the era of Stalin, Hitler, Mousillini, Franco and the twin specters of communism and fascism. World War Two and the Cold War were the direct descendants of the First World War’s chaos. Humanity lost not only decades of peace and progress as a result, but gave birth to technology that leaves us within reach of nuclear Armageddon to this very day.

It has now been 63 years since the end of the Second World War, and we have not seen a conflict of that magnitude since. Many of us now think that such a conflagration is impossible owing to the globalization of the world’s economy – such a war is not in anyone’s interest, the thinking goes. We also believe it because the apocalyptic weapons that we now possess can make war so suddenly and completely devastating that it could easily end civilization, and perhaps even extinguish humanity outright. We could be right on both counts, and still completely wrong in the belief that large scale war is now impossible. We were wrong once before, after all.

And now Russia invades Georgia. Today’s news makes it sound as though Russia may be pulling back from the brink, and we can only hope that is true. Many on the world stage are starting to realize that this conflict is far more than an old ethnic and territorial quarrel. It is about Russia’s aching desire to once again dominate it’s old empire, and it’s greedy eye on control of central Asia’s energy exports. Russia has done all that it can to re-assert dominance over the territory it lost when the wall came down, and Vladimir Putin does nothing to hide his grief at the collapse of the old Soviet order. Russia’s real motives were laid bare not just by the appeals of Georgia’s president over the weekend, but the revelation that it is Putin who is actually controlling the operations of Russia’s military, not Russia’s president.

Vladimir Putin is no Adolf Hitler, and any comparisons between the two are not only dead wrong, but badly misguided. Underneath his sharp business suit, however, Putin very much resembles another old nemesis of a peaceful Europe. That nemesis was Otto Von Bismarck, Imperial Germany’s chancellor and the architect it’s long path toward the First World War. Bismarck believed in nothing if not an assertive and powerful Germany, and like Putin he ruled the nation from behind the scenes. Kaiser Wilhelm, for the most part, provided ceremonial endorsement of Bismarck’s wishes. Bismarck in turn supported a strong monarchical institution – he was an old-school autocrat who powerfully distrusted democratic governance in any form. He spent much of his career and constantly seeking to render Germany’s elected Reichstag powerless, and he largely succeeded. When the Reichstag once stood in the way of his plans to confront Austria, he famously said: “Not through speeches and majority decisions will the great questions of the day be decided… but by iron and blood.” You can be sure that Vladimir Putin feels exactly the same way. No man alive has done more to undermine Russia’s progress toward representative government than Putin, and no man stands more firmly as a symbol of Russian might for might’s sake.

Let’s just hope that another of Bismarck’s sentiments does not spring to life once more. When a member of the German General Staff once spoke to him about the growing possibility of a large-scale war with France, Bismarck said “I will not live to see the world war, but you will, and it will start in the East.”

Meet the new boss – same as the old boss.

I own two relics of that seemingly ancient conflict, the one which started in the east with cavalry on horseback and ended in the west with machine gun emplacements, trenches, chemical warfare and aerial bombardment. One of them is an artillery shell casing my great grandfather brought back from France after the shooting had stopped. It was hammered into a flower vase with the word “Verdun” artistically beaten into relief midway up. The second is his campaign history, an elaborate leather bound book with a sort of corporate diary of his army unit. It is complete with some pretty bleak photos and day-by-day accounts of the war.

Here’s hoping that long from now I have descendants with no such relics from our generation.

It’s a Small Thing, but…

I flew the American 450 from Atlanta to Dallas this morning, and although I fear cursing myself by saying this, the experience was very smooth. I can now call this a trend – planes which are leaving on time and generally lacking in any of the drama and unpleasantness that so thoroughly characterized my first few months of flying this year.

Perhaps it was the smooth sailing today that enabled me to fully absorb something I’ve observed before without quite taking it in. It caught my attention this time while in line for a snack and a bottle of water at the T12 Starbucks. It was a small thing, but a revealing one I think.

The woman taking orders at the Starbucks counter was making an effective effort at being cheerful without being forced. With a bright tone in her voice she was asking each patron “How are you doing this morning?” I love it when I see people do that, and I even admire it when I see it done at a menial job in which so few people would find very much to be cheerful about. At least I some small way that simple little act on her part requires a measure of character and courage that isn’t necessarily easy to reach for.

I did not notice any of the responses us patrons were making to her until the guy directly ahead of me took his turn ordering. His reply was not “fine” or “good” or “hi” or any such acknowledgment – only “caramel machiatto backflippiolo with reduced carbon footprint” or some such bobo milkshake allowed to masquerade as coffee. That’s when it hit me.

The barista was invisible to this guy. She wasn’t even there. It seemed sad. When you make the kind of effort she was making there aren’t many rewards you can hope for. Regular customers on the T Councourse are not going to be that numerous, so there’s little chance of building any of the casual acquaintance relationships you might in another location. And there’s zero chance that her day’s pay will go up by even a dime no matter how cheerful she is.

No, just about the only external reward she could get for her effort would be some simple acknowledgement, some notice from the person on the other side of the counter that she was trying to be pleasant, even kind. But the fellow ahead of me wasn’t playing. It was one of two things. Either he was distracted to the point of being a little rude, or he cared so little at her effort that he consciously ignored it. The result was the same either way for her, but the latter would reflect a lot more poorly on him. It reminded me how much you can tell about someone by how they treat people when they have little or nothing to gain from them. How this small thing actually reflected on this man on this particular morning is anyone’s guess. It was unknowable, and nothing I could control in any case.

“Fine! How are you doing?” I said when it was my turn. She smiled a big thank you and proceeded to take my order. It was the least that I could do.

Confessions of a Fan Boy

On last Thursday afternoon I flew in from San Diego, landing at the DFW airport about 3:30 pm. I did not drive in to the office. I had already worked about 60 hours by that point last week and was badly in need of some personal time. So instead I drove to the Knox Street Apple store and checked to see if any phones were in stock. I had been checking iPhone availability morning and night for nearly two weeks and by Wednesday it had finally looked like the drought was over. This was my first chance to try getting one.

Of course they were out, having exhausted their stock earlier in the day. So I asked one of the store employees about what time of day they were running out. Lunchtime. When do the lines start to form up outside the store? About 7:30 am. Roger. See you in the morning. And home I went, sleeping like a stone for about 11 hours.

The next morning I woke up in time to get breakfast, get showered and get to the Apple store by 7:30 on the nose. At that point my bad Apple days finally started drawing to a close. Although the line was already halfway around the block by 7:30, I still managed to buy my phone and leave the store by 9:15. I headed into the office and managed to restrain myself from fiddling with it all day, and then even into the night. After work H came over to visit and finish watching Kingdom of Heaven on my Apple TV. That worked out much better than last time since it was fully downloaded. What’s more, I had also been able to download an episode of The Tudors – one of her favorite shows – but we have not gotten around to watching that just yet.

Saturday morning it became all about the iPhone. Before I even left the apartment to run my day’s errands I had downloaded about six new applications (most free, some not) and begun using them. My music, podcasts and a couple of photo albums were also synched up and ready to go. I couldn’t keep my hands off of it for the rest of the day. This thing is how every phone should be. It is a delight to use. For a moment set aside all of the browsing, email and fancy applications – just the core phone features are tremendous. The call quality, tight integration of contacts, dialing, SMS and voicemail are simply hard to beat. I’ve owned quite a few smart phones going all of the way back to the original PocketPC phone from T-Mobile and pretty much every Blackberry they’ve ever made. As a phone, this thing crushes all of them. And then there are the other applications.

The iPod features are fantastic, the email is great and the web browsing is by far the best I’ve ever seen on any mobile device. Some of the third party applications on the App Store are also genuinely useful in a way that software could not have been useful before the iPhone came along. I’m telling you folks, this thing is crack with a touch screen. In fact, maybe all Apple products are crack. By the time mid-afternoon had hit on Saturday, I was back in the Apple store. That’s right – I went back to buy another fix, I mean another piece of gear.

It was a Time Capsule. I’d been resisting the temptation for months out of buyer’s remorse because the darned thing launched shortly after I had bought my Airport Extreme for the apartment. But I really did need the functionality. I had zero backups of my MacBook here in Dallas, which has become my primary machine. You know the drill – every bit of music, pictures, financial records, email, personal documents – everything was on this machine with absolutely no backups. Crazy talk. Something had to be done, and although certainly there were much cheaper solutions than buying a Time Capsule, the spell cast over me by the iPhone eliminated all inhibitions. Setup back at the apartment took minutes, and since then I’ve lived in backup bliss knowing that my MacBook could die an untimely death at any second and I’d pretty much lose nothing.

But even then I wasn’t done. I loaded up on more Podcasts and bought two episodes of Penn & Teller’s Bulls***! show on my AppleTV. Pretty much every speck of entertainment for me this past weekend came in some way or other from the Mother Ship in Cupertino.

What has happened to me?

Despite my disappointment in how badly Apple’s product launches went a couple of weeks ago, and despite the fact that Mobile Me still doesn’t work, I once again find myself a delighted Apple user. In fact, I’m “all in” at this point. There’s no core product they make that I don’t own. I’ve got one of their desktops, one of their laptops, all three kinds of wireless access points, their phone and their TV set top box. And I want more. I lust after a MacBook Air, and I can barely restrain myself from splurging on one.

Despite their spectacular failure with Mobile Me last month and their ham handed response to their own problems, on balance this is a company that is still knocking it out of the park when it comes to developing amazing products. By comparison, their ability to deliver great Internet-based software services is positively Stone Age, but it sounds like they are at least going to try to make that better.

Maybe I’m so entralled with Apple products because this “digital lifestyle” thing is something that I’ve wanted for years. Having an integrated experience between my computer, my television and my phone was something that I tried doing with Microsoft products shortly after the launch of Windows XP. I had an XP machine at home, an X-Box and a Windows Mobile phone. I imagined that it would be straightforward – or at least possible – to unify that ecosystem of devices in such a way that my music would be playable everywhere at home and my personal email, contacts and calendar on my PC and phone would easily be synchronized with each other and the web based service that my PC connected to. Boy was I wrong.

There was no way to leverage my XBox to play my music library from my PC, look at my photos, etc. It was good for Halo and that was about it. My PocketPC phone could synchronize contacts and calendars with my PC well enough, but it was perfectly useless as an entertainment device. Showing pictures even was clunky, playing music was a joke. Oh – and it was a TERRIBLE phone. Dropped calls, lousy coverage, lots of lockups and reboots. Even a few “restore to factory state” episodes. An expensive waste. Meanwhile, my new Windows XP desktop slowed to a crawl when I tried to synchronize my contacts, email and calendar with my MSN account. The piece of software they provided for that purpose – the Outlook MSN Connector – was the all-time worst piece of junk I have ever installed on a computer. It crashed constantly, jacked up my contacts and calendar and basically rendered my machine unusable. I tried getting it to work off and on for about two years and finally gave up.

Six years later what I wanted is now (mostly) in place. Seamless integration of my music, pictures, and video across my TV, PC and phone is now a reality. Ironicially, the one place where Apple has badly stumbled is the same place where Microsoft utterly failed years ago – seamless synchronization of email, contacts and calendar info between my PC, phone and the web. That said, I fully expect that Apple will straighten this out and deliver on what they promised before too long. Indeed, the “leaked” email from Steve Jobs yesterday seems to assert that they will do just that by the end of this year.

I believe that Apple will keep delighting me and siphoning off my savings account. I have come to accept it. At least at some level, I’m… I’m a fan boy…. There. I said it.

Apparently Not

About three weeks ago I asked “Is it Hot Yet?” when I posted here on the crazy heat that was getting ramped up in the Texas summertime. That weekend was hot, but it was nothing compared to yesterday. The mercury climbed to 107° and it felt like Hell’s boiler room by late afternoon.

When I see people running for exercise in this heat (and I do, every day) I can’t help but think that they are insane. Or maybe Terminator robots looking for Sara Connor that don’t realize we can pick them out when they do that. We know any human would have heat stroke if we tried what they were doing. Stupid Terminators. They never quite get it right do they?

Anyway, apparently it was not hot a few weeks ago here in Dallas. I’m really hoping that it is now. Seriously.